Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Nekid Fisherman Joins Facebook
9:35 AM | Posted by
Cassie Designs
Facebook for Anglers
OK. I have finally done it. I’ve given in to technology. I heard about this Facebook thing but I couldn’t make sense of it. I don’t think many people are interested in my face—or any other part of my anatomy, for that matter. But I finally agreed to give it a try. My wife tells me to do it for my grandkids. Like they’d ever own up to having me as their Gramps.
So I started by completing my PROFILE. Heck, I was all ready for a nice sideways photo of my casting technique. I always liked that profile. As it turns out, this PROFILE is just a lot of nonsense information about me that no one is interested in anyway. So what you see is what you get—basic information coming from a confirmed liar.
Before I go any further, let me get one thing off my chest--this thing called POSTING. Up until yesterday the only writing on posts I’ve been interested in is the “No Trespassing” sign I may encounter along the river. Now I learn that I have to POST something on my Facebook. Sounds suspiciously like that wanted poster that used to bear a remarkable resemblance to my twin brother.
So anyway, after I POST things, I find out I have to FRIEND people. I have to tell you—that makes me very suspicious. The only “friends” I’ve known are those rascals that buddy up to me just so they can find out where my favorite fishing spots are. Some friends. By contrast, my wife has more than 500 FRIENDS on her Facebook. Can you imagine what would happen to my stretch of river if I suddenly had 500 friends hounding me. So here’s my advice: If you want to be my FRIEND, just don’t expect me to take you fishing. It ain’t going to happen.
There. That should keep a lot of pesky folks on their computers looking for friends that they can email. Just means fewer people on the river….
Now I have to be honest about this STATUS UPDATE. Keep in mind that I’ll be writing only when I want to or when I get around to it or when I’m not fishing. That should be about 2 or 3 times a year. Unless, of course, you show yourself to be the kind of FRIEND who tells me where you fish. It’s kind of like that “you show me yours and I’ll show you mine” thing among anglers. (I’ve never used the phrase “tit for tat” in a Nekid Fisherman article. Not only does it sound a bit racy, I’ve never figured out what a “tat” is.)
As I understand this Facebook enterprise, once I get you as a FRIEND, I have to POKE you. Now that’s something I’m familiar with. You know those “friends” I referred to that just want to find out where I fish? I’ve had to poke more than a few of them when they showed up tromping through my favorite holes. Just don’t try to go poking me…you may find yourself dangling from my POST.
So now my next lesson is about how to do this UNFRIENDING thing. That something I think I already know more about than most people. For now, you can follow me on Facebook, but if you follow me on the river, you might just get poked.
The Nekid Fisherman
nekidfisherman@gmail.com
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